Continued Melodrama

My 12th grade English teacher (shout out to Bart!) once had us write a short essay on the quotation
 "It hurts to find out that what you wanted doesn't match what you dreamed it would be." 

So true. I have a chronic problem of finding something I like, obsessing over it to the point of losing sleep, researching reviews for months, finally ordering and then... Being totally disappointed.

Exhibit A:

Kiersten w/ her camera. Its easy to become very jealous of her and her beauty. 

Fancy camera. It began with envy for Kat and her cool Canon. And grew into an obsession that was sated only when I purchased my own and gianormous lens that were "totally necessary" in order to record my Middle Eastern exploits.  I love taking pictures with it, I do. But a much smaller, much cheaper, Canon would have been just as suitable for the kind of photography I do. 

Exhibit B:

the mixer that didn't change my life

Kitchen Aid Mixer. I wanted one so bad. Spent months comparing models. Ordered one as my Christmas gift, completely confident in the knowledge it would fill my life with joy and bring my culinary prowess to new heights. It hasn't. 

Yes, my legs really are that white. 

Latest case in point: Shabby Apple dresses. I've been looking at them for approximately a year, and getting as far as putting them in a shopping cart - then backing out, for about 3 months. So I finally pulled the trigger under the pretense of an Easter Dress. I narrowed it down to two, ordered them both, and then planned on deciding which to keep when they got here. 

Really wasn't kidding about the translucent legs
They came in time for Easter and I was elated! Except, they are totally shoddily made. Not as bad as "Lauren made her own Halloween costume", but still pretty bad. Dresses of that price point should at least be lined and have smooth zippers! Another obsessive purchase disappointment.

My getting a picture of the dresses turned into an episode of America's Next top model, with Dan serving as both Nigel Barker and Miss J

So... The point of all that is, this blog post is to serve as a reminder to myself that OBSESSIVE PURCHASE DO NOT EQUAL HAPPINESS (on to the theory that impulsive purchases do). 

In other news...
My beloved and faithful Civic took a beating on Sunday when Dan got rear ended as part of a big rain storm induced crash. 

Poor Civic is in the shop getting fixed up. The logistics of two people sharing one car is tricky, but no car is impossible. So we have a rental car in the form of this monstrosity:

 I feel incredibly dangerous and self conscious driving it. I feel like I'm always about to hit people and in their heads they're thinking "Stupid Red neck in that bright blue dodge!" But it came in handy for the Boy Scout camp out that Dan is currently on.
Maybe it is the loneliness of being home alone all weekend (having already watched the new Glee three times), but I really really want a dog. I even miss this little demon:

On to the New Recipe of the day: I have a have an unwavering love for Chocolate Chip cookies. Their batter is my favorite "food", which I generally eat till I feel extremely ill.
I've been intrigued for a while by a recipe that I've seen on several food blogs for a New York Times Choco Chip Cookie. Its a recipe from this famed baker, and I thought I'd give it a go. I required several things I normally don't have: Bread Flour, Cake Flour, Unsalted Butter, 60% Cacao baking rounds, and enough patience to let it chill undisturbed for 36 hours. It wasn't easy and required a small fortune spent at Whole foods. But I made them. And they were pretty good.

 But not the mind blowing food experience I had hoped. More dashed dreams. Back to my good old Nestle friends. 

Lo's Thoughts (on Motherhood/Education/Careers)

(me in Haifa, Israel- has nothing to do w/ the post)

In my recent quest to be readmitted to BYU, I've given a lot of thought as to my return to BYU and what will happen after I finish those 15 dang credits and graduate. I gave myself an ultimatum for deciding what to do with my life: spend a whole year off school in Monterey and decide what to do by the end of it. Well, its been 8 months and I'm still no closer to a decision.

 As a young BYU Cougar I was perplexed/outraged at how many Young Women stuck to conformist roles and majored in either A) Elementary Ed or B) Nursing. As I grew in my cougar years, I watched as my female peers "gave up" on dreams of Medical or Law school, finishing a Bachelor's degree (in the best cases) and then opting for a life of Stay at home wife/motherhood - and I was again perplexed/outraged.

Well, in my (partial)year of soul searching, I've come to a great realization: There is a reason women do this. 

1) The most important job women have is motherhood. For a lot of Young women this is a "duh". But for me it took a while to gain a testimony of. I'm a person who likes validation and recognition, and motherhood does not offer the same level of that (at least from the world) that say becoming a brain surgeon does. I now truly believe that I will find no greater fulfillment that when someday (in the far distant future) I become a mother.

 2) Women have time restraints. It is near impossible for a woman to attend school full-time (as is required for Law/Medical/Most post bachelorette programs) and fulfill her responsibilities as a wife and mother. So while men have the option to have a family while still pursuing education, women really don't.

3) Many women have to become the bread winners in their families at some point in their lives for a myriad of reasons (divorce, injury, death, or unemployment of spouse.) And when it comes time to step up to the plate, it is important that she not only have a degree, but skills that qualify her for the workforce. Such as Nursing or Teaching! It makes sense! A liberal arts degree (like mine) qualify one for... I'm not sure what? I still think women should pursue their interests, but also have a plan as to how their interests translate into a marketable skill.

And that is where I messed up. 

In this month's Ensign their is an article about a Single Mother returning to school to support her family. The church employment counselor laid out for her a few education choices: all of them with a terminal vocational ending. I hope I never have to be the sole income supporter for my future family. But I want to be prepared if I do. So, onto more contemplation on how to remedy my situation (I still have at least a several months left - no word from Cougarville). But to my younger sisters and others: Start out with a plan!

Fugitive Harboring and EASTER

We had another visitor this week! Actually, the experience was much more similar to harboring a fugitive, than to entertaining an out of town guest. Meet Roxy:

(I think its kinda cute how only one ear sticks up)

Roxy is a Minature Pinscher/Retard Mix, who, in a moment of weakness, Dan volunteered to watch for an ENTIRE WEEK.  At OUR HOUSE. Did I mention we are absolutely FORBIDDEN FROM HAVING PETS in our lovely apartment? Awesome experience really. Every time we took her out, one of us had to make sure the coast was clear, then create a diversion. We often relied on the cover of darkness to camouflage our potty runs. 

(She likes to lick faces. Gross.) 

Roxy was alright, I actually kinda miss her companionship. Its not her fault she's a small, somewhat retarded dog who gets so excited she pees. She served as a reminder that we are waiting to get my much anticipated canine companion till we have an actual yard/house. And that when we do finally get said dog, it will be larger/older/mellower/have better bladder control.

Dan gave me some EASTER flowers. I think it was also to soften the blow of him leaving to go backpacking w/ Mark for two days, thus leaving me with sole dog smuggling duties. 

We got together with some our friends and had an EASTER Extravaganza. Beginning with a Brunch on Saturday, for which I made Dan's family's traditional Conference Cake (its Coffee cake.)

(Rebecca and Quinta showing how its done)

We then moved on to Easter Egg Dyeing. 

This was my best one using the "Stocking and Leaf" method

And this was my best one/only one that really turned out from the "Silk Tie" method

So before Priesthood session, there was a Potluck at the church. I was pretty amused with the lengths Dan went to in order to secure the crock pot for the 5 minute drive over. Speaking of Conference, it was really good! I thought there were many great talks about Women and their importance, and roles as mothers. I was in no way outraged by Julie B Beck this year. Which is always a good thing. 

(Can't see it here, but the plastic wear had GLITTER IN IT! I was so excited by this.)

Sunday we had a Big EASTER FEAST!

We had lots of delicious food. Like "no amount of Jillian Michael's could save me at this point" delicious food. Lamb, scalloped potatoes, Appetizers, Rolls, salads, Jello... and homemade CHEESECAKE.

happy easter!