TurkeyLand! Gobble, Gobble, Gobble, TURKEYLAND!*

(* Chorus from traditional Parowan Elementary Thanksgiving Song. My dad sings it. And it is incredible.)

In the hierarchy of Lauren's Favorite Holidays, Thanksgiving ranks pretty much near rock bottom (just below Rosh Hashanah). For a person who doesn't eat turkey, this holiday holds little appeal. However, I whole heartedly embrace any reason to go to St. George. Plus, with all the awesomeness that transpired this Turkey Season, the holiday may have to move up in my ranking system:

I’ve missed out on the awesomeness that is the Jubilee of Trees the past few years. So I was overjoyed to make it just in time for the final day! Our Neighbor Mrs. Doty sponsored several sections of it – had to get a picture with the giant poster of her. There were some cool trees- but the entire Jubilee was a lot smaller than usual. I think the downsizing was indicative of the recession, which appears to have hit my beloved STG quite hard. 

Due to the fact my mom’s kitchen is still being remodeled, we did Thanksgiving with one oven at my Grandma’s house. It all worked out and the food was as always delightful. 

We got to enjoy it with both sets of Grandparents, plus my Uncle Nate and cousin Allie.

kat, biting into the turkey neck, that my mom boils, just incase there's insufficient gravy. yeah.
 I made improvement on pies (though last years was more of a chocolate soup) and rolls (read: unrisen rocks) from last year – but I still have a ways to go before I achieve Thanksgiving Chef Star Status. 

In an effort to combat post-glutton day obesity, the ever thin Anna organized the first ever “BENSON FAMILY TURKEY TROT.” It was a relay composed of .5 mile and 1 mile legs.  

My team won, (almost solely because of my supernaturally fast Dad), and was rewarded with fine trophies courtesy of Anna. Many have already begun training for next year’s endeavor. 

Every time I go home I harbor the hope that this will be the time I will leave without crying. That I will finally be a grown up and able to leave my family without a breakdown. No such luck, as my puffy eyes would indicate. I persevere knowing that I shall return in 3 short weeks for Christmas, thereby giving me another chance at a dry-eyed departure. It could happen. But it probably won't. 

I miss each one of them too much. Even the obese beagle. Especially the obese beagle. 

Primary Lesson Not Learned

My little CTR friends have been outta control lately. There are now 9 consistent comers, 3 of whom I believe should be on Ritalin. I decided to imploy some bribery on Sunday and bring a treat - which was not easy since one kid is forbidden from eating gluten and J-Horse is "Deathly allergic to peanuts. That means if I eat peanuts, I will die!" Bribery worked and order was restored to our class in so much that I could deliver a lesson on forgiveness. I also gained another J-Horse gem, "Sister Mealy, can I make a comment that is off topic?(he really talks like this!) The opposite of forgiveness is revenge. When someone does something mean to us, and we do something mean back , that is called REVENGE! Jesus doesn't want us to get REVENGE!"

Flash forward to Tuesday. I was minding my own business, reading a new cookbook and listening to NPR in the car as I waited for Dan to get done at PT. Next thing I know, someone bangs the side of my car with their fist. I roll down my window and proceed to be yelled at by a Marine for my lack of patriotism. Apparently (I didn't hear over the radio, I honestly have diminished hearing) I missed that they were retiring the flag, and should have gotten out of my car. I don't handle being yelled at well. Not at all. I proceeded to ball my eyes out for the next hour and a half. Then I began to think how I could take action.... I now have decided to return to BYU and join ROTC, become a Marine Corp officer, become this dude's commander, and punish him mercilessly till the end of time. 

What was that you were saying about revenge, J-horse?

If this was half way, not the finish, I would kill Myself

We ran a Marathon. 

Well, technically it was only half of one - but I dare you to tell my quads it was only 13.1. They will not believe you. Despite being voluntary torture,  it was actually quite fun overall. The Big Sur half Marathon (which does not take place in Big Sur) is officially my favorite race thus far in my extensive (not) career: beautiful day, well organized, great course, and nice tech shirts (they even had the pink ones in women's sizes for the girls, that sealed the deal for me!)

One downfall: It was crazy crowded! The first two miles were spent just weaving in and out of the crowds and jockeying for personal space. 7,000 people participated - they had to start us in several waves and caged us in estimated finish time corrals. 

I had two goals for this race: 

1) To not despise running after said race, and want to run again

2) Finish under two hours. 

I caught Dan at Mile 10 and we stuck together the rest of the way, but when I looked down at my watch and realized I was pretty close to not finishing under 2, I decided to sprint as fast as I could the last quarter mile. 

I thought Dan was next to me, but apparently he didn't pick up on the strategy. I ended up beating him by a bit - which the Champion of Artichokes is none too pleased about. But I accomplished both my goals, so its all for the cause. 

We got nifty ceramic medals and a box for food after crossing the finish. The food tent was pretty sweet. I  loaded up with fruit and a bagel and a muffin, and then I went to grab a hard earned and much deserved sugar cookie. And I was denied! "If you got a muffin, you can't have a cookie!" What?!? Had I known that I never would have touched this vile poppy-seeded monstrosity. 

And that was the worst part of the whole event. So help me, I will get a cookie next time!

Before moving here, Monterey was described to me as "Paradise." But if this is Paradise, I would like my townhouse to be in the 7th circle of hell, please; I'd feel more comfortable there. I found myself to be very unhappy for the first while we were here... I felt my hard earned arabic brains melting away as I led a seemingly inane existence. I felt like I was stagnating and being passed by as my peers back at BYU were graduating, getting jobs, and moving on. Then I ran (well, actually walked a fair amount) of an Artichoke filled 5k. It felt good. So I set a goal, a lofty one for someone who could only run a single mile without stopping. I signed up to run the Big Sur Half Marathon. Exercise gave me a purpose, a goal, and  quantifiable progress as I got faster and ran longer.  Doing our long runs together on Saturday mornings  gave Dan and I a rare chance to share a common interest (though I'm thinking of getting into this new Call of Duty Black Ops, NOT). So cheesy as it sounds, I feel like this Half Marathon changed my life. You may now throw up.