Lo's Thoughts (on Planning a Wedding)

One of my frequent blog reads, Tifsong ( a gal I went to elementary and high school with), recently became engaged and posted questions soliciting wedding planning advice. It got me thinking… So much so that I HAD to write it all out. I figure I have three little sisters who will eventually marry. Maybe someday this list will be useful to them?

THINGS I WOULD DO DIFFERENTLY:

1) Photography- Since I was roughly 10 years old I was sure that when I got married Nick Adams would take the pictures. And he did. And it was our biggest expense. And he did a great job. BUT, I think someone else could’ve done just as great a job at a lower expense and had a faster turn around time (wedding album 18 months later?) I really like her work and his work. But Photography is still the thing I would spend the most money on. 

 2) Dress- I love my wedding dress, but wish I would’ve gone with one less expensive/on sale/ borrowed. I originally fell in love with a crazy expensive one (it was blush pink!) at Alta Moda in Salt Lake. Luckily it was a designer dress that couldn’t be cut in time. I can’t imagine how guilty I’d feel now if I had that dress! My dress is beautiful, but it was pricey to begin with, and the alterations to add sleeves and take up the back weren’t cheap either. ( I still am obessed with my old fashion lace veil, don’t regret the money there at all). I have some guilt over such a pricey dress never being worn again. I would hope one of my sisters would like it enough to wear it, but every girl wants to pick out their own dress – can’t blame them there.

3) The Venue- I was dead set on not having it at a church, but it really doesn't matter all that much. Had ours not been a summer wedding, I would have loved to do it in a backyard. Or at the Santa Clara town hall. Or even a Church. The Bell Tower was another cost I think could’ve been cut.

THINGS I WOULDN'T CHANGE:

 1) Flowers – Weren’t important to me. Kept flower costs really low, mostly just my boquet. Which I still really like.

 2) Luncheon – Our greatest triumph. Held at my favorite restrauant Scaldoni’s (now closedL ) – it was Dan and I’s favorite part. We ate delicious food (I ate every last bite of my Chicken Gorgonzola) and actually relaxed & enjoyed the company of just our closest friends and family. 

3)Dancing and a Line – Another success. We had one hour of a line, then one hour of dancing and mingling. We got to greet all those traditionalists who appreciate the formal handshake (not me) and then people ACTUALLY DANCED!

 4) The Big Band-  They were a referral from my sister’s violin teacher. I braced my self for the worst. But they were AWESOME. I think they were what made the difference in people actually dancing. SO much fun.

5) Food- We just went with the least expensive Bell Tower offering, cheesecake (which wasn’t that inexpensive). I never got the chance to eat it anyway. Glad we didn't spend on extravagant Reception food. (Though if we'd had the reception not at the belltower, we could've brought our own food, and then I would have made sure donuts were involved. Dan and I's favorite!)

6) The little things that made it us. Cokes in glass bottles. Chuck Taylors. I wish we'd done more little things like that (Donuts?). 

 7) Getting Sealed to Dan in the St. George temple – Not something I would change. Also, the 8:30 time worked great. Not too hot and I'm totally a morning person. 

Ahh… A trip down memory lane. It reminded me how lucky I am. Thank you Mom and Dad for providing me with a gorgeous wedding, putting up with my meltdowns and everything else. Thank you Denise for sewing ALL of my bridesmaid’s dresses and putting together our open house. I am really lucky.

Anyone else want to share their wedding planning triumphs and failures? I think it would make a great read!

New Years in St. George

Six Observances from New Years in Dixie:

1) My Mom's New Kitchen remodel was totally worth all the hassle. I can say that because I was in no way involved. It is beautiful.

2) Sugar Gliders are the world's worst pets. Katheryn got two of them for Christmas. They scream at you. Though Anna's ferret might give them a run for their money.... What happened to owning cats and dogs?

3) Red Cliffs is perhaps most beautiful when hiked in December

But it's flipping cold! (Dan and I aren't in the picture because we're the only ones without cool hats)

4) I am really bad at bowling. I bowled a 20. Both rounds. That's okay, I'd rather be good at something that isn't totally lame....

5) Dad's Rocket Day is still Awesome

Especially when it requires a rescue mission

6) Playing minute to win it can be fun. If it involves your Grandpa with panty hose on his arms. 

After a wonderful New Year's in St. George, we voyaged back to Gloom Mountain to get back to the daily grind. I kicked off our return by ruining EVERY last pair of scrubs I have. Someone leaves pen in communal dryer = Lauren has Dalmatian scrubs.... Grrrr. In an effort to cheer me up, Dan took me to Black Swan. So about the movie...

Whoa. That's all I have to say. Whoa. 

1-1-2011

I love New Years. Not really the night itself, (being that I'm a hard core party girl who feel asleep at 10), but the chance to start over. 2010 was a great year, Dan and I actually lived together for it's enitrety, in one place. Progress right there. Some other highlights:

{JANUARY}  We get our Farsi dreams dashed, have to completely re-plan our lives, and go on a trip to San Francisco together.

{FEBRUARY} Rick and Denise come for a visit and the MMA tradition begins

{MARCH} My family comes for a week long MMA

{APRIL} We host friends for Easter dinner, The Civic gets smooshed and we have a series of rental cars 

{MAY}  Dan becomes an E4, We run the Artichoke 5k - Dan becomes a champion and we embark on a new running hobby, We find out No French Slot in May = more life plan changes

{JUNE} Birthdays!, I get to go to STG to turn 22, Awesome (not) Army Ball, we go on our first (of many) Backpacking Trips

{JULY} 30 Days of No Sun, The Streeters abandoned us, Salinas Rodeo!, poor Civic gets broken in to

{AUGUST} We celebrate 2 years of BLISS!, Go on a trip to LA, Dan got kidney stones, and Kiersty came to visit

{SEPTEMBER} We go to Yosemite, I throw my first (and last?) Baby shower

{OCTOBER} Dan finally starts french, We wear awesome costumes to Bonni and Pete's awesome party, Run the Big Sur 10k

{NOVEMBER} We ran the Big Sur Half Marathon together! Went home for Thanksgiving.

{DECEMBER} Two glorious weeks in Utah! Christmas, new nephew, and more!

It was a good year. 

I also love New Years for the cliche setting of New Year's Resolutions. Last year was the first year I set them, and accomplished them:

1) Compare Less

(This one is obviously still a work in progress, but I feel I'm in a much better place with this one than I was a year ago. I'm making a concious effort not to judge my own happiness against what I percieve others to be). 

2) Exercise More and Eat More Real Food

(This is the one I really feel I aced. We eat almost all whole foods and I now excercise consistently 5 days a week. Plus I ran more this year than I'm sure I have collectively in my whole life. I pat myself on the back). 

3) Cook a New Recipe Every Week

(Did it, never mind they were 90% dessert recipes....)

I was spurred on by last years success that I decided to set them again this year, and do more!

LO'S RESOLUTIONS FOR 2011

1) Strength Train 2-3x per week

I am a total cardio addict. I love spin, but I would rather die than lift. This must be remedied. I've read so much about how strength training has so many benefits. Must do it. Wish there was body pump here. Still, must do it!

2) No Cokes, More Veggies

This is no joke my hardest goal: No Diet Coke in 2011. I don't know if its the hypocrisy of buying free range eggs and wild cherry pepsi in the same trip or the fact that I peed my pants due to guzzling the stuff, but I'm kicking the addiction. Also, for being a semi-vegetarian, I don't eat vegetables. So I shall make it a goal to eat one veggie a day, and a full salad a week. 

3) Apply for Graduation with my Bachelor's Degree

Because really, its high time. 

( i will never look like this)

4) Accept my Body by Stopping Fat Talk

I made great strides with fitness this year (no pun intended). It feels good. However, I was much dismayed this year to discover that healthiest Lauren does not equal skinniest Lauren. No matter how many spin classes I do, or Greek Yogurts I eat, as long as I’m not starving myself, I can’t get to my “Magic Weight.” This year’s goal is to keep up the healthy habits, and work on accepting my body how it is. I will never have the body type of a frail 6”0 super model (or my sister Anna.) I want to have body confidence, so someday, when I have daughters of my own I can be a good example for them.

5) Use my Time More productively

Limit Internet Use (One hour a day), Read a Real Book a Month, complete one big project from my ever growing list (like organize 2nd Bedroom)  per month

6) Go to the Temple Once A month

Our Bishop challenged us to do this. It will get much easier once we are back in Zion. 

7) Cash Budget

Do the Cash Budget each month and stick with it. None of this rationalizing you get rewards with your credit card business. 

8) Do one Thing to Speak Dan's Love Language Every Day

Whenever I want to improve our marriage, I think of things I want him to do for me. But that's not really how it works, is it? I want to be a better wife and thus enjoy a better relationship everyday. 

Lots of goals, but all very do-able. I think. Check back in 2012 to find out.* 

*That is, if they Mayans are wrong and there is a 2012. 

Christmas in Clinton

Christmas in Clinton had all the right ingredients for a perfect holiday: lots of food, lots of family, and most importantly, NO SNOW (not even frost on my windshield!). Twas truly wonderful.

We made a pre christmas trip to Bountiful to see our pals the Streeters. They successfully escaped Gloom Mountain in July and Monterey hasn't been the same since. Also, they decided to be traitors and went ahead and had a baby. Just kidding, he's a cute little guy and we're very happy for them. Really.

Christmas Day we slept in, leisurely opened presents, and relaxed. Molly made out like a bandit.

Dan said it was his "best christmas presents" year ever!!! Highlights: tomahawk (pictured above), giant knife/(ka-bar kukri machete), shooting earmuffs, fine north face clothing, gun scope, and new five fingers! The tomahawk was immediately taken outside and thrown around the yard. Boys and their toys....

Dan and I got this beautiful Minerva Tinchert painting of Christ for our house (those are my gel fingernails going strong there). 

Later Dan's relatives (2nd cousins and the like) came over for a nice Christmas Dinner.

I was the dessert czar: coconut cream pie, chocolate budnt glazed with peppermint, and a gingerbread pumpkin cheesecake.

A christmas miracle occurred when Dan found a way to make Molly like him: throwing her high in the air, plopping here on the couch, tickling, signing for "more", repeat. Pretty cute.

I didn't have to resort to cheap tricks to get Molly's love. I simply provided her with a "mink" (my binky = mink). This little monkey made us seriously consider getting one of our own. She was so much fun. No worries, we came to our senses and are back to baby hating.

Posing for a picture with Dan's Nana before departing. Except departing got complicated when our trusty Civic decided to have problems... Three jump starts, one mechanic trip, and replacement battery later (December is the most expensive month ever!) and we were on our way south.

We stopped in "Happy Valley" to meet up with our long lost friends, Jesse and Danielle.

I'd been holding out for Cafe Rio (still haven't had it yet) but Dan was "DYING OF STARVATION! PERSHING AS WE SPEAK!", so Jesse guided us to the nearest Mexican joint. It was pretty delious, especially the above fatty nachos. Never mind that there were a few hairs found, "added fiber". Plus the company more than made up for it, we miss the Richs (fellow co-patriots in the Childless and Proud Club). We are now enjoying every minute we can in the STG before our inevitable return to the torturous trap of Monterey. Let's not think about it. Let's think happy thoughts. Cafe Rio. Cafe Rio. Cafe Rio. 

Find joy in the Journey. Except when the Journey is 13 hours.

It's been over a week since I blogged. Don't worry (I'm sure you weren't), we survived the grueling drive and made it to the land of promise! I am writing this from within the Zion state. We made it here just in time for some birthdays ("So close to Christmas? That must have been hard."*).

My BFF Branda turned the big 23! To celebrate we ate sandwiches at the Great Harvest and got gel manicures. Side Story:
I may have drunken 90 ounces of Diet coke.
The Asian nail lady may have not let me use the bathroom in fear I would mess up the polish.
 I may have peed my pants... Like noticeably peed my pants. Just maybe.
Anyway, I miss B. And her little guy even kind of likes me now! Good times all around.

My Grandpa (who now lives in the STG) turned the even bigger 78! Kat and I made him a Carrot Cake. Even though I am morally opposed to dessert that A) doesn't have chocolate and B) contains vegetables. It was actually good. After our stop in STG, we continued onward.

(had to take a pic of Dan's plate. So much color! So much nutrition!)
Along our journey up to the Northern Parts, we stopped at the illustrious Chuck-a-Rama in Draper, for the "Benson Family Gathering." My family (the Stan Benson family) is known as the "late family." In the words of my dad: "We haven't been on time since 1986." So you can imagine his elation when we arrived to Chuck-a-Rama EARLY. Like 15 minutes early. Like before everyone else early. So early, that he went and got a plate, ate it all, and had it cleared before his family arrived. He is still currently reveling in this fact. 

We were very excited to see our niece (who we haven't seen since she was 3 months old) and our brand new nephew! The little guy is just a couple days old.

Dan is obsessed with trying to win Molly's affections. Really though, how can one resist the darlingness that is our little red headed, piggy tailed, big blue eyed niece?

Though I have done a lot of trash talking about STG's preeminence, it turns out that I love Clinton! Between going to Body Pump at Gold's Gym in Roy, and finding my beloved Fage Yogurt at a Super Target in Riverdale, I am ready to become a northern Utahn. Dan and I want to buy us a foreclosed townhouse in Syracuse right now. We'll cut our losses and not even make the 13 hour drive back to Monterey for our belongings. Just leave it all there... Sorry Mr. Bitey.
(* Arrested Development Quote. You really should watch it.)

Christmasing

In exchange for food and an occasional pat on the head, Mr. Bitey submits himself to torture. Dan picked up this lovely cat beanie on our ornament Target trip. Christmas Cat, it is simply hilarious.

On Friday we attended our Ward Christmas Party. It was fun to see all the decor, as Bonni was in charge of it and we got to help a bit. I got to hold a santa baby, watch my beamers sing songs and hit each other with "rhythm sticks." Good times.

I think the differences in families and the merging of them in marriage becomes most apparent during the holidays. Everyone does Christmas differently. I tried this year to find out more about Dan's family holiday traditions in an effort to incorporate them into the far superior traditions of my family. (kidding.)

Dan and I both agreed that some of our best childhood Christmas memories involve doing a "Sub for Santa". (The good memories even include the year my family did it for 3 old people in a care center. And my sweet old man that I visited and took presents to died. And then one of the creepy nurse aide guys took the nice clothes we gave the little old man and wore them....)  I was ecstatic this year when we found a "Sub for Santa" assignment for two little girls. However my hot pink, sparkley, Barbie, Polly pocket filled dreams were dashed when we were informed there was a mistake: instead, they were two little BOYS! Ugh. At least Dan's nerf gun filled dreams came true. It was fun. And warm and fuzzy. "Sub for Santa" is an important tradition we will carry on.

Lo: "Are there any traditional holiday treats I can make for you? Stuff your family makes?"

Dan: "Nope."

Lo: " Like my family makes caramel corn wreaths. What did your family give to neighbors?"

Dan: "Frozen turkeys."

Lo: "This isn't working."

Nothing says Christmas family traditions to me quite like treats! But working everyday this month has cut into my bake fests. All I've made so far is peppermint frosted brownies. Sadly I don't think i'll get all the way through my two page "Want to Bake For the Holidays" list. It's probably for the best though, certainly my thigh circumference will benefit.

{my family's card this year}
Christmas Cards & Yuletide Letters. Every year my family sends out a picture and a hilarious letter written by my Dad. Its possible that the Yule Letter is only funny to my family, but nevertheless, it is awesome. Dan and I decided to hold out on sending out cards till we have a kid to feature in it. Or at least a dog. So consider this our Christmas Greeting to Friends and Family:
Merry Christmas. Love, Dan & Lo

Ghetto Wal-Mart Tree. Year 5.

{danielle w/ pink tree. Year 1.}
One cold snowy Provo night, as an overenthusiastic (and overweight) BYU Freshman Co-ed, I ventured to Wal-mart, at midnight, with all 6 of my roommates. We were in search of holiday cheer in purchasable form. I found a $30 artificial tree and got it for our apartment (we decked it out in sparkly pink decor, much to the chagrin of one particular roommate). I went cheap, supposing it was a one year venture. Little did I know that the tree would go beyond the horrible semester.... 

{it certainly didn't help that Zaza liked to hang out in it. Year 3.}
 Said tree is in our apartment right now. Going on year 5. And lets just say, its not going strong...

We decided to continue the tradition started last year of each picking one new fancy ornament. We made a whole date night out of it and ventured to several locals in search of THE ornaments. In the end, Dan got a robot. I opted for the Abominable snowman petting rudolph in an homage to my favorite Christmas movies. Beat that.

Next year we shall have a real tree. So be it if I must personally go to Pioneer Park and cut one down out from under a homeless man. It will be real. There will be no Ghetto Tree Year 6, so help me. 

We're getting in the christmas spirit here as we count down the days till our return to Zion. A Peppermint Twist candle, some candied almonds, and Pandora providing holiday tunes make our apartment down right festive. Also, it's a good thing that Santa no longer brings me things (the ultimate sacrifice in getting married), because I'm not sure he'd like this year's wish list. My wants are rather unsleighable:

1) A brown Doberman Pinscher. 

The one I see on Saturday morning runs. I will love him more than his present owner. I promise.

2) Acura MDX. 

Call it a Soccer Mom Car. I call it true love.

3) An Apartment in the Avenues. 

With a washer/dryer, dishwasher, wood floors. And allows my Doberman. And doesn't have noisy/crazy/messy/cross-dressing/trashy neighbors.  I'm really not asking too much here. 

4) Dan to magically become an officer and us to be stationed in Germany, so I can spend my weekends in Paris gorging myself on croissants. 

Yes, that is what I want more than anything. 

Maybe there will be a Christmas Miracle....I'm trying to be REALLY good. Because as my mom always used to say/threaten: "Santa's Elves are watching! And they're taking notes!"